Apr 11, 2011


Amanda is a class younger than me but from how close we are and how much we talk during any particular day nobody would ever be able to guess that we belong to completely different classes of my university. I never really noticed Amanda before I got to know her. I had seen her walking around college but she never grasped my attention, although she is somewhat of a head turner.

We're pretty close friends now, however our friendship happened by chance. When I was going to States in 2009, she happened to be on the same flight as me. But she would be with me till my stop in UK. She had to change airports for her next flight. I didn't even spot her at the airport. It was actually the first time ever I would be going air anywhere so I was excited and nervous all at the same time. Also I was traveling alone, which made me even more cautious about the things going around me and not so much about what others are doing. She spotted me quite early on but approached me when I was sitting in the waiting lounge. I'm kind of shy around new people but fortunately for us, she's quite a talkative person. By the time we were boarding, we were chattering like we had known each other since quite some time. "Can I sit next to you? I don't want to get stuck with someone I can't talk to!" she asked me excitedly.

"I don't mind but I don't think that's possible! Our seat numbers are entirely different!", I told her disappointingly. Even I would have loved it if we were together.

"I'll just ask who ever is sitting next to you, or you can ask who ever is sitting next to me! People are generally nice and don't mind exchanging seats! Nobody really cares, unless they have a window seat!" she chirped away. I really didn't know how to respond to it, but she asked this big tall dude if he would be willing to swap seats with her - with a smile. He didn't mind!

"I'm sitting by the window but you can have it!", I told her politely.

"Oh no! You're traveling by air the very first time so you deserve a window seat. Now sit!"

I'll admit I did want a window seat but had to be gentleman, so I asked her. "Did you know that I used to have red hair?", she asked me sometime during the flight.

"I just started to get to know you about an hour ago, how would I know?!", I told her as a matter of fact.

"Oh yeah! Anyhow my family forced me to dye them black so that I won't stand out in a crowd!", she told me playing with her hair.

"You still stand out in a crowd!" I told her making a reference to her height. She's freakishly tall for a girl. She's 5'10. Girls rarely go above 5'7 or at least the girls I generally hang around with. Next to them, she's like an amazon.

"Well yeah, but they really could not do anything about my height. Thank Heavens! I would hate to be short!", she complained.

"Thanks for the morale boost!", I spat back.

"Aww no! You're cute!" she complimented. I think I must have turned all shades of pink on spot. The only girls who had openly complimented me on anything were from my family, so this was a completely new territory for me. Our flight to Bahrain was of 2 hours, but we stayed up talking about just about everything. I don't remember how exactly but our chemistry rapidly grew when we started talking about Ugly Betty. We shared a mutual love for Amanda and Marc, but then most Ugly Betty watchers feel exactly the same.

In Bahrain, though we were staying at the same hotel during our 18 hour stop but we were in separate rooms. We had lunch and dinner together, and watched TV for a while in her room when she called me up. I was extremely nervous in her room, I felt like I was doing something so extremely wrong. But after a few minutes I calmed myself down because there is really nothing weird going on. We're just friends!

Our flight to UK was much longer than the one to Bahrain, so we slept through. But when I saw she was up, I went up to her. This flight was so frigg'in empty that there was no need to ask anybody to exchange seats. It was cool. When we split in UK, we exchanged email addresses and kept in touch. I came back to Pakistan much later than her, but when we met in college it was like we had never really split from the Heathrow Airport. Our friendship has definitely blossomed since then as I have guided her through a few tough times by listening and offering my advice when I felt I had any.

Now I feel that we have more of a brother-sister bond than simple friendship. It was the feeling of this bond that pushed me to do something I have been planning to since 2011 started. If you haven't guessed it yet, then I came out to her just today and it went extremely well.

Shocker, no?

Details about Amanda and the coming out episode in the next few posts! 


Mind Of Mine said...

Do you think maybe the reason she was so comfortable with you from the beginning is due to the fact on some level she knew.

She did not have to worry about sending you the wrong signals as a straight man.

Faisal Khan said...

Looks like its the coming out season! Well, u guys have some guts!

Andrea Almanza said...

yay, sounds like a good friendship! Those can make life so much more bearable.

Aaron Khan said...

Now DAT is an interesting turn of events. QUICKLY post d next part!

Phunk Factor said...

@ Mind Of Mine

I don't think so! When I told her, she seemed genuinely surprised...and the whole coming out was because of an earlier argument tht we had regarding me criticizing every guy she likes! :p

@ Faisal Khan

Who dares steal my thunder?! :p

It takes gut...but in my case..it was more adrenaline!

@ Andrea Almanza

I know..it's so amazing i can't put it to words!

@ Aaron Khan

Gimme one good reason! :p

M@rvin said...

Nice, congrats! She sounds nice.

How do you pull it off with straight girls - what's the secret? They hate me for some reason. :)

Whimsical Hatter said...

Sweet.now, do you know any of those kind around here.or all these ones, always *around* you?! seriously.not jealousy,just curiosity:-)
kind of shy around new people?!ahem.I shall refrain.;-)
and the adrenaline, that you talk off,care to lend some.please

Phunk Factor said...

@ M@rvin

Stop making a play for their boyfriends and they would start being nice to you as well! :p

But I think ur being too critical - some girls are shy and that tends to come off as snobbish! Plus get rid of the 'mean face'! ;)

@ Whimsical Hatter

Fate has blessed me plenty MashAllah! :)

About adrenaline..if i cud, I would!

Rakesh said...

In your line of work, I've seen women get much more comfortable if they know you're gay. :)

Average Queer Slut said...

Wow! Man..that's all I can say WOW!

How do you manage it? Isn't the thought that she might say it to a 3rd person frighten u the least?

I do not mean to scare you but everytime I think of coming out to anyone, I feel like I'm standing in a frozen waste land!

Phunk Factor said...

@ Rakesh

Patients or co-workers?

And women are always more comfortable handling this fact in my opinion as compared to guys!

@ Average Queer Slut

It's all adrenaline, man! It's all adrenaline! :p

She won't..that's the thing u see...u only tell somebody wen ur perfectly sure that they would keep ur secret!

And lastly...only come out when u are entirely comfortable with the thought of people knowing about you!

Rakesh said...

I meant patients.
I like your comment "only come out when u are entirely comfortable with the thought of people knowing about you!". :)

Phunk Factor said...

@ Rakesh

I don't think my patients will get to know about my orientation unless I tell them! :p

N yeah...that part is totally from the heart! Never come out unless u urself are sure of ur orientation and u are comfortable with the thought of the that person knowing about it!

Rakesh said...

I was making a general observation about gay paediatricians and women patients.

Phunk Factor said...

@ Rakesh

Cool! I am considering pediatrician as one of my specialization choices!

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