The integral fault in my dating technique is that I don't date - at all. I like a guy. I express my feelings. I get it on through text messages, e-mails and once in a while phone calls. By the time I actually meet the guy for the first time, I'm already committed to him.
There is never really any courting, which is a very essential step in a relationship. You can spend as much time as you want talking to the person through IMs, text messages or even phone calls, but the real deal is meeting that person face to face.
When you're sitting across a table or you're walking around some mall, there is so much going on that you can assess and draw a better inference from. Everything you ask gets an answer, but this time it's accompanied by body language, facial expressions and tones. By the end of the date, you've got a fair enough idea whether you want things to proceed further or not.
Keeping all this in mind, I resolved to date as many guys as possible in 2011 - and hopefully still be single by the end of the year. I've been fortunate enough to have not been rejected. Both the times, I've liked the guy and I took the leap. Call it luck or call these guys chivalrous, I didn't fall flat on my face. We got it on however only for about 5 to 6 months.
According to Ryan, I'm a real catch. I do not believe in that so much, because if I truly was one I would not be single. He says that the only reason I am single is because I pick the wrong guys. I have the worst taste in men in the history of mankind. His female cousin who was born just two days after him, crushes on the most obnoxious guys ever. And I rate even worst than her in his opinion!
Since I skip the courting, I never really get to know the guy and assess if he wants the same things that I want. I dive in and the rose-colored glasses slip over my eyes. By this time, it's too late for discussion about issues that matter to me. I can either go forward at the cost of some huge compromises or I break it off and do what I want. If I date properly, these problems would never really be an issue for me. I would have a guy who actually wants what I want and even though we don't have the entire picture clear in our head, we do have a general idea about how to go about creating our masterpiece.
I have a feeling Ryan knows what he's talking about. Who knew there was a brain behind all that beauty?
Landing such a guy would be tough, no arguments there. But I'm an optimist, another plus point which would keep me running in the dating business. While I do agree whole-heartedly to this evaluation, as barely three out of every ten guys I meet would probably have a chance of seeing eye to eye with me. However my plans and choices of dating in Pakistan are far limited due to reasons I'll be posting about later. But if by chance, I do land someone suitable I am still not entirely sure if I would let things progress to the point of relationship.
I'm scared, and I haven't even begun dating yet. Oy Vey!
With that said and done, it's time to introduce my new blog on my twisted dating experiences. You may head over to Coffee & Boys. GoPhunkYourself will still be running - smoothly I hope, however my dating fiascoes shall not be displayed here. First post coming very soon!