Dec 28, 2010

Thank You 2010

We're almost at the end of 2010, just 4 more days left until the new year dawns upon us. Looking back on the whole year, I can truly say that it's been a good year on most parts. I'm thankful for having survived another year, but no matter how much I thank the Guy upstairs I do feel that it won't be enough. I know there have been moments that have forced me doubt His existence and there have been so many times when I gave up on my faith. But something got me through all that, since I can't project this drive on anything else I'll take my hat off for Him.

My time in college has also been fairly good. I got rubbed really hard with all the assignments, clinical cases, presentations and researches I was made to do. Given that most of my group loves to slack, a majority of the workload was dumped on my back. I owe Gracie alot for helping me in complete it all. Even though I was in direct competition with her group having the same topics all through the entire year. She was by my side, even to the day before my presentation helping me. I wish I could hug her for that, but she doesn't approve any sort of physical contact. I hated the subjects I was supposed to study this year, and I'm kind of dreading the ones that I'm going to be studying next year. But that's the way of life! I find Pharmacology so freak'in easy now that I have cleared through it all. But when this year started, I had a mental break down just a month through it because I couldn't get a grasp all the drug names and their adverse effects.

Another significant happening that occurred this year was the birth of my blog and everything that I have posted here has gotten so much positive feedback that I truly can't believe it. Alot of posts that I felt were absolutely ridiculous have turned out to crowd favorites, this happening has given me more confidence in my abilities and instinct. Also having to share some of my more explicit views and stories with you guys makes me feel good. Being gay is as much a part of my life as being a medical student, previously I had a small circle of friends whom I knew and shared it with. But this blog has opened my doors to a whole new crowd, all of them who have been so welcoming and warm towards me. Also a huge 'Thank You' goes to all the people who have reached out to me sharing their stories of accepting their sexuality has been so over-whelming at times. The only thing I could ask for is to stumble across some cool lesbian blog. If anybody happens to know any, please drop the in the comments section, I'd be very grateful!

The high-light of this year was definitely the time I was in love. Nothing can absolutely top that feeling and those days, like I mentioned previously it was the time of my life. From March to September that I was involved, my life rocked! I do admit that the end was bitter and I was left completely shattered, also my views on love and relationships have changed since then. But I do not regret falling in love. I do not regret having lost it. I do not regret becoming vulnerable. I do not regret any of it. I was in love and I loved being in love. If by any chance I happen to fall in love again the coming year, well that's a completely different story.

Have I grown?

I would say that I have! Maybe not as much as I would want to have evolved, but any change in the positive direction is a welcome change. A few happenings that I can not share right now have sparked the drive in me to score better in my academics and make something of myself that my parents would be proud of, especially my dad. I really want to make my dad proud after all the hardships I got to know about that he endured while he was completing his MBA. My sister was almost 4 years old when my mother was pregnant with me, and my dad was doing his MBA at that time. To manage a career of odd-jobs, student life and a family all at the same time is a huge responsibility.

I can't even begin to imagine how my dad pulled it off. My dad will be retiring almost 7 months after my graduation. By the time that he does, I hope to have started my residency so that he can relax. There is alot I want to do for him. I have never really discussed my dad on the blog, but someday I may. I know he won't accept my sexuality but I don't care if he doesn't. He's my dad and I just can't hate him. I can't even think of the thought. Impossible!

2011 is going to be a big year for me with all the things I have planned for myself. I hope I'm around to share it with all you guys and you guys are here to share your hopefully amazing 2011s with me.

Happy New Year everyone! 


raulito said...

I am glad somebody said something positive about very few of us can.

thanks for your blog


Phunk Factor said...

@ Raulito

No matter how bad a year goes for anybody, there are some moments that they can look back upon and feel happy about!

I firmly believe in that....cuz God doesn't give us what we can't handle! :)

Thanks fr dropping by!

M@rvin said...

Phunks, hope you have a great year ahead! I know the loves of our lives are waiting for us somewhere in the future.
Agree with you, better to have loved and lost than never loved at all.

Derric said...

Hmmmm, no comments but a simple wish for a beautiful years ahead, where you may achive all what you 'actual mei chahatha hae'

Anonymous said...

happy new year phunk

Phunk Factor said...

@ M@rvin

Thanks fr the wishes, man!! I hope we ALL have a great year...a year to be thankful for!!

Initially I thought of writing that exact sentence down...but I thought it would be too much of a cliche! I wish I had used it now! :p

@ Derric

All wishes are welcome!! Hope u have a great year ahd of u too, buddy!!

@ Anonymous at 1:15

Happy New Year to u too, man!:)

Sebastian G. Oliver said...

Love the way you looked back on 2010, we all have to make sure we give thanks for what we have and look towards the future!

Phunk Factor said...

@ Sebastian G. Oliver

Exactly! :D

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