Dec 19, 2010

Is There A Doctor In The House?

Mrs Cohen is heartbroken. Her son has declared he's gay and intends to move in with his male lover. Mrs Goldblum comes round to comfort her. "Look on the bright side," she says. "He might be sleeping with another man, but at least he's a doctor..."

I read this joke somewhere earlier this week and wanted to share it with my mom. So I copy pasted the joke and emailed it to her - it's a trend with the two of us and also my mom loves getting any sort of mail. Yesterday I happened to remember it and asked her about it. She told me that she had read it and enjoyed it quite alot. To say that I was surprised, would be an understand. I predicted that she would enjoy it but not 'quite alot'. You see anything to do with homosexuality tends to put creases on my mother's forehead immediately.

I have wondered at times how it would be to have a boyfriend/life-partner who belongs to the same line of work as I do. I have no fetish for doctors but I must admit good doctor do tend to intrigue me. There is something about doctors that symbolizes determination, intelligence, a spark for life and class. People employed in the medical field - doctors, dentists, nurses, etc; have always had a certain advantage when it comes to being chosen as a life partner. In the Pakistani society getting married to a doctor - especially if you're not a doctor, is considered to be nothing less than amazing. In most eyes, you are instantly labeled as the 'It' couple. Everybody wants to be friends with you! Everybody wants you over for dinner! Everybody is in love with you! Why?

The answer is extremely simple but also incredibly stupid. Doctor/Doctor and Doctor/Non-Doctor couples have a higher chance of raising doctor babies. Making a good contact right now means your child could possibly be considered as a suitable match later on. In my opinion that's one of the most ridiculous things one can ever do because there is no guarantee that the baby which pops out of the so-called holy vagina is even going to choose this career or be successful at it.

Nowadays it's no longer about being a doctor. It's about being a great doctor. Keeping up with the latest medical trends, having the highest patient satisfactory rate, doing some ground breaking research and all that sort of stuff. Textbook supremacy is about as backward as black and white television.

Finding a gay doctor is going to be extremely hard. There are only five gay guys I know who are practicing medicine and two of them are completely off the shelf. I'm talking about Ryan and Junior, in case somebody is wondering. Given the restricted number of guys who are actually interested in establishing something long-term, it's going to be extremely difficult to find a doctor amongst them. Also is it going to be awkward sharing work space?


Given that our entire agenda involves dealing with the public if the word gets out that we're gays, it could lead to a shift n the patient's notion about coming to us for a consultation. As bogus it is sounds, patients should not be considered with what I do outside of the hospital. But when he/she comes to me, it's his/her sand-box and I need to treat them to the best of my capabilities keeping my personal thoughts and feelings aside.

Doctors and dentists also tend to earn alot. By alot I mean freak'in filthy rich, wiping-asses-with-hundred-dollar-bills-rich! The first nine spots in the Biggest Earners list are held by various professions all belonging to the field of Health Care. CEOs grab the 10th spot, but the next five again belong to us again. However cushy our work sounds, it's extremely risky. Every patient who comes to us with whatever complaint be it a simple flu, a broken bone or cancer is hopeful and wants to get better. We have to do our job! We have to get them well soon! Malpractice is the real thing we have to worry about, that is omission by a health care provider that deviates from the norm and in turn causes injury or harm to the patient. That's shit scary!

Going back to doctors being top-notch earners, if the point of life comes along to adopt a child we would have the financial check box done with a big fat tick. But with the busy schedules doctors tend to have, is it advisable for both partners to be doctors?

I have alot of cousins who have married doctors and have kids of their own, they seem to be doing a good job. But a large part of the upbringing is being done by their parents aka the kids grandparents. Worth going to my mom for raising the kids?

I believe she's done a fantastic job with us guys. But the whole family set-up is definitely something my mother won't find easy to digest. And also, would landing a doctor partner, make it any easier for my parents to accept my sexuality any easier?

Once again, I'm doubtful about it. My parents- especially my mom would love to see her children have life partners who are doctor. But it's not a necessary thing. My elder sister is such a staunch follower of this rule that she doesn't even consider a proposal if it doesn't come from a doctor. By the way, my sister is a practicing doctor herself. She believes that work plays a very important part of the daily conversation at home and if her partner doesn't know a flu from a cold she would really have nothing to talk about with him. In my opinion, that's incredibly selfish and snobbish. But she's my sister so I can't say anything about this to her!

I've still got time and perhaps I'll date around to see what's out there. It's not a must for him to be in the Health Care business, it's just a plus point. I'm fine with almost anything except for porn stars, bull fighter, politicians, weather forecasters, castration experts, clowns - these are just a few I can name from the top of my head.

Also I'm going to completely loose it and strangle whoever asks me if I feel excited when performing a prostrate examination. I've done two and believe me, there is nothing pleasant about them. Yuck!


On a separate note, this post happens to be my 100th post and the next post is going to be the Blog Awards post. I've got my eyes on a few blog who deserve these trinkets of appreciation!


M@rvin said...

Congrats on 100, yay!

Become a surgeon, find an anesthesiologist - you can go into business together. :) And hey, I'd love to have a porn star BF!

Raj said...

haha!! Actually even I believe that docs have sort of demi-god attractiveness in them.But I m not a big believer of both partners coming from the same profession.
So what do you think about an Engineer/Financier? :P
I don't know about pak but in India these are as coveted as medicine.
Also,How can you not like politicians.I mean power makes me weak in the knees.And I m not talking about alot of illiterate Ind/Pak politicians though who would mind belawal bhutto or Rahul gandhi but the politicians in the west just make me wanna jump em.(I mean the young and hot ones of course ;) )

Phunk Factor said...

@ M@rvin

How? How? How?! :o

How can you be fine with having a boyfriend who fucks other men and has it filmed for dozens of more men to watch? :o

@ Raj

I'm fine with Engineer as long as he doesn't have to go away from home for long periods of time....i hate those kinda jobs!

Financier is cool....would come home in formal clothes that i get to take would be Christmas everyday! :D Pakistan too these careers are big hit but not as much as health care!

How can I not like Politicians?

Well, I said that keeping Paki Politicians in mind...they're a bunch of aholes!!

P.S. Bilawal Bhutto is SO not going to go in politics, I can bet on that!


oh that is a sexy idea! You being coupled with another successful doctor is kick ass! You two won't get into arguments about who is bringing in the most bacon and you two can take lavish vacations or get-aways together and money would be no problem!

M@rvin said...

Well, hopefully he is successful enough that not just dozens, but millions watch. :) My main requirement is guys be nice, I've just seen so much nastiness on the internet from grad students, professionals, etc. But yes, I'd be a little worried about disease with a porn star BF.
Hee hee, agree with Raj, Bhutto's son is rather cute.

Phunk Factor said...


I don't mind how much bacon he's bringing as long as he's doing it because it's a man yea, I do care it to be a legal thing, u kno! ;)

@ M@rvin

LOL @ Disease

I didn't think it that yea, that's a thing to think about as well! :p

He's cute...but not my type! :p

Derric said...

Hmmm, i dont remember having crush on a doctor...gosh my choices were bad, i should start thinking of next generation, and be more

Congratulations on hitting 100

Phunk Factor said...

@ Derric


P.S. Exactly how were ur choices bad?

Derric said...

it wa bad beacause i did not choose

Phunk Factor said...

@ Derric

U had a doctor and u let him go?! :o

Srsly...what is wrong with u? :p

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