Jul 7, 2010

So Today Sucked

7th of July was supposed to go great! 7th of July was supposed to be amazing! 7th of July was supposed to be an epic day! 7th of July was supposed to be memorable! 7th of July wasn't epic, amazing or even great. But yes, it was memorable. But not in the way I wanted it to be!

But I'm going way too fast, so let me shed some light on the details of this horrific day. I so need to blog this out! Nathan and I have been on three dates. Yeah, I know! I've yet to blog about the third date, it'll be up by tomorrow hopefully. My Internet service is completely screwed these days. Anyhow so we were supposed to have our fourth date today and this one was supposed the it date. I had finally managed a way to get a moment of privacy for us to be together. It all happened so quickly last night. I psyched up my family to go shopping as my younger brother has absolutely no suitable clothes to wear to my cousin's wedding that's coming soon. I displayed his current collection, most of them he has out-grown because of the teenage growth spurt. So everybody was going shopping, everybody except me. I had a class to attend, which Professor Nathan would be teaching. And I was planning to be a very very naughty student! We could have had our private moment. And we both were so excited about it!

Morning came, and I was all juiced for a spicy, sizzling afternoon that I had been waiting for. I know it wasn't the most romantic set-up, but the sneaking around and all gave it an adrenaline punch. We would have about two and a half all to ourselves with absolutely no disturbances. I was suppose to pick him up around 2 PM and bring him back to my place. My family would be gone by 2:30 PM and we would be home by 2:45 PM. I planned to make a call home to make sure that they have left. If they hadn't, we'd take abit longer. But we would definitely be home by 3 PM.

So I went for a shower at 12 PM and the door-bell rang. When I got out, guess who was there?! The repairman! The freak'in douche-bag of a repairman I had specifically instructed to show-up at 9 PM or later today. And to my complete annoyance, nobody had stopped him or anything. He was in the room, with his tools everywhere and repairing the God damn air conditioner. And in that one moment, I saw my entire plan crack like china glass. I contacted Mom to tell her about the repairman. She told me that she'll stay back and I was like 'No! Tell him to go and come at night or tomorrow, just not right now!'. But obviously, I couldn't say that. I mumbled in agreement.

I locked myself in the room and messaged Nathan instantly. Let's not meet today, he suggested. His mood was completely turned-off and I couldn't really do anything about it. I grabbed the keys and asked him that we could go somewhere out or something, but he denied. He was looking forward to being alone together and everything else would simply pale in comparison. We actually had a talk about yesterday about kissing and that led him to voice his fear of going back home without having kissed me even once. Being native to Pakistan, it was my responsibility to arrange for a place for a private moment. Earlier I had suggested a hotel for a day, but Nathan argued that it would be too suspicious if we book in for a few hours only. This isn't America, where you can get dirty in any motel room!

I was in my car and I couldn't go back home, so I phoned a friend asking if I could come over?. He said that he's got guests at home, so we decided to meet at some place and invite others as well. I made a detour and was the first one there, so I grabbed a booth for the group. As I waited there, I kept cycling through Nathan's messages and at that moment I wanted to be with Nathan only. I waited for the first one to show up so that I could hand the booth over to him and go home. It really wasn't worth doing anything else at this point. My heart was just not into it!

I stepped out of the cafe and looked up. It was the most perfect weather ever to be with someone you love. It was cloudy, slightly breeze and so cool. This weather rarely happened in my city. I finally had someone to be spend this awesome weather with, but it's all so screwed. I jumped into my car and as I put some life into it, the radio started blasting. I don't know if it was a freaky coincidence or what. I don't remember what was playing earlier on the stereo when I got out, but right now it was playing Jordin Spark's 'Battlefield' and I mumbled 'You really want me to cry out of frustration and desperation today, don't you?' and plugged the stereo off.

A very quick ride later I was pulling the car into my home and I saw my family leaving from the other exit. All I could think of at that moment was 'FML!'. It's really not in my nature to swear, but I really couldn't think of anything more appropriate at that moment. The repairman had left and that's why they were going. But it was too late to go and pick up Nathan now. I walked into my room and headed straight for the shower. I was showering and my phone started ringing like crazy. It wasn't Nathan since I have assigned him a separate ring tone so that I know when it's him calling and I can slink away if I'm in public. I didn't bother. It wasn't my family either, since I've assigned them their own ring tone too. I let the water pour down and take away all my anger, I'd call back whoever it was once I'm out.

I got out of the shower and checked my cellphone. Gracie called! What?! Seriously?! Gracie never calls. Okay, maybe rarely. But when she does call, it's something really big. So I gave her a call. Turns out she was at the house one of the girls who were coming today. She started complaining how I have been ignoring her in the vacations and there is something off about me lately. I told her that it's all in her head. Then she complained that the guy who I handed the booth to, told her that I was in a very bad mood today. She kept asking me what's wrong?, and I had to put up my best cheerful voice to throw her off. It was literally one of the most exhausting talks I have ever had. In the end I had to say, "Gracie, it's all in your head! We'll meet on Friday, I promise!". She began arguing again, but I kept repeating Friday, I promise. Finally she agreed. I threw my phone and collapsed on the bed.

The phone beeped after a while. This time it was Nathan. He had simmered down and apologized for the way he behaved. He explained that he was looking forward to it and when I told him that it may not be possible, he got really pissed. He asked if there was anything he could do to make-up for it?, that was so sweet of him. I told him if anything pops into my head, I'll let him know and we started talking about stuff as usual.

My net was still completely fizzled but I decided to give it a rogue try and went online. Surprisingly, it worked! But then as I sorted through my Orkut account, I got another bad news. Christian's Orkut account got hacked and deleted. Every topic he ever created in the forum went away with that, leaving me completely shattered. Thankfully Christian made a new account instantly, but still all the memories that we lost can't be replaced. Although we do have a fair idea of the culprit but if we nuke him out, we would be sinking to his level. So we're staying out of this one, as hard as it is to put up with this disaster.

I am literally frustrated beyond belief, so I'm blogging it all out. This quite possibly maybe the worst post of the decade, but some day I'll be having a great day and I'll read this post, and thank God for the giving me a bad day so that I appreciate the good ones even more. Everything has a purpose, nothing goes wasted!


Mike said...

Oh dang! Sorry things didn't work out!!!
That was really close in trying to bring Nathan over. I'd be so upset too!

I was thinking that it would be interesting to hear about what life/sexuality/living in Pakistan. I have a few friends from there that are Muslim, and they just say that you are subservient, covered, and sexuality is never shown.

H said...

Don't worry Phunky, it'll get better, I promise.
I think you should try a movie hall; it's worked for me.
And honestly, I'm sure nobody at a hotel would care. Moreover, it's not like you're going to ever see the hotel receptionist again?
Go for it!

Phunk Factor said...

@ Mike

Yeah...I've been searching for anyother Pakistani gay bloggers but haven't had much luck in finding any!!

So I've decided that i'll be posting about that sometime sooner or later! Let's see!

@ H

Movie halls don't work....the small ones have too much light in them and the large ones don't play our kind of movies! :p

I agree to what you said but Nathan isn't comfortable with the idea..so there really is no point in pushing him!

Nathan's comfort matters ALOT in the whole deal!!

Derric said...

Hey i am sure the perfect moment willl just pop up

Phunk Factor said...

@ Derric

Fingers crossed, man!

M@rvin said...

Have to agree with your BF, motels are no fun - nothing like doin' it at home. Hope you guys get some privacy soon.

Johnny said...

I'd advise not to go to a hotel as well! Once I dated a guy who wasn't from Pakistan...we planned to do it in a hotel but when we got there, we totally chickened out!
We then met next time at a farm house...i'd recommend that! Closer to nature and alot more privacy!

Phunk Factor said...

@ M@rvin

Yeah...but I was running out of options so suggested that!!

@ Johnny

Farm house? Errr no, man! They are located way outta the city and Nathan can't manage to spend the night over!

▬╡νι¢кソ╞▬ said...

best wishes phunky... i can understand how it must feel, but hopefully all will be well pretty soon, all the best.

Phunk Factor said...

@ ▬╡νι¢кソ╞▬

Yeah..let's hope! :)

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