Apr 4, 2010

You Keep Me Hangin' On

Pick a card! Any card! And get done with it!

I don't like it when I'm left wondering as to where I'm headed with somebody. I can't stand to see time getting wasted, every moment I think about where do I stand with him I'm just running around in circles in my head. And so, those moments go wasted. I could have been doing something better like studying Gram Positive Bacteria or watching Glee or listening to music or even jerking off.

Yeah, I pretty much hate it when I'm left in the dark of the situation. It's not just in the dating business, but I'm also that way with my class assignments and my syllabus. Having been born to extremely professional parents, I have been raised to do tasks methodically. I function this way. I agree that I can be a control freak, but I'm just as prone to cut loose when I'm told to do so.

After weeks of wondering if Bruce and I were still on dating terms or that if we've become friends or if we're no more. I decided I should call him up and talk it out. Texting just isn't going to do the trick, especially if I reply with curt answers when he texts me after days. I know it's completely wrong of me to do so, but you deserve it when you're avoiding my calls and don't bother getting back to me. Or even when I ask something as remotely simple as, how did your day go!

The call was short, he was busy with his family so couldn't talk properly. At least he was being honest, I could hear some kids screaming in the background. He asked if we could meet sometime soon. Apprehensively I agreed to the offer but at a condition.  

I get to decide the venue, time and date. He had no problem with that. I said I'll text him the details within 24 hours. He mumbled in agreement and put the phone down. There wasn't even a 'good bye'. Humph!

Within an hour, I had planned the entire meet and I was about to send him the details when my mind went back to the call. He clearly wasn't the same Bruce I knew before the Lahore trip and I felt that this meeting would very possibly be the very last one. So I decided to move the date closer, very much closer. Whatever was going on, was more or less over. I texted him the new details. He replied back with a single word, 'OK'.

I doubt that I have ever felt this insulted before. And then I knew, we were finished. I know it seems really impulsive of me, and also it really didn't matter anymore to me what he had going on in his mind. I wanted to wipe my hands off this mess once and for all. It's not only that I wanted it to be over. But some of the things he said at times irked me really bad. I didn't see the sense of letting him know about it, especially since he knew that it had bothered me and he refused to apologize about it.

I tried hitting my books again, as that what I was doing before I had decided to call him up. But no dough! My concentration had been shot to hell. I resigned myself to revising the chapters I had already covered. But even then, I didn't manage to make much progress.

By the way, I decided that we should meet the very next day.

Interested in seeing the video of the song I put up?

You can check it out here.


gibben said...

I found this presumptuous!

"After weeks of wondering" - put an end to the wondering.

"He mumbled in agreement and put the phone down. There wasn't even a 'good bye'." - Doesn't mean he got BORED talking, okay.

"He clearly wasn't the same Bruce I knew before the Lahore trip" - maybe you're not the same cause you're thinking too much!

"He replied back with a single word, 'OK'." - Not insulting, Darl.. I found that cute!

" I know it seems really impulsive of me" - doesn't just sound but it sure is!

"But some of the things he said at times irked me really bad." - did you make it obvious to him? you should have.

So sit down for a discussion, you two!

Easier said than done, No? Anyhow!

P.S. Just my "stupid take" on the whole thing but in the end - its you who knows best! *HUGS*

Phunk Factor said...

@ Gibben

Yea, i kno.......wait for the follow-up!!!!

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